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It’s a very natural human tendency to judge both ourselves and others. In today’s gospel we see the guests making swift and sure judgements about who is most deserving of places of honour at the table. Jesus is quick to point out the dangers of this:
“When someone invites you to a wedding feast, do not take your seat in the place of honour. A more distinguished person than you may have been invited, and the person who invited you may come and say ‘give up your place to this person.’”
Even with the best of intentions it’s very easy to cause more pain and discord by making wrong judgements. Reflecting on this has brought me back to two very basic Benedictine values, humility and hospitality. I think these can help us step back from the tendency to be judgemental.
Humility calls us to acknowledge that we are in no position to make judgements about how things should be arranged, or what others need or deserve. A humble attitude helps us to admit that we don’t know what is best for others and to be open to learning from them. However well intentioned our judgements can often cause hurt and distress.
Hospitality, the call to welcome everyone as we would Christ, offers us a way to avoid this. The first step in hospitality is to give another our whole attention, to allow them to tell us what they need, rather than assuming that we know. If we do that with open hearts, putting aside our own judgements, we will be able to discover what will make them feel truly welcome and accepted.
Where are you being called to put aside judgement today?